bazz | Entries tagged with dream

Wow strange dreams. It started with a lot of random weird stuff that I can't exactly remember except that there was a lot of sex involved. At one point I was kissing a girl who I had previously found repulsive. I had to explain to people that I really did like her because they assumed that I was just using her for sex or something (which I wouldn't do, BTW).

At one point, I opened my closet and there were all new clothes, in a trendy style I have never worn. I looked at the price tag on one suit and was appalled that it cost $79 (Yes, I realize that is actually super cheap for a suit, and I suppose that illustrates how far removed from the norm I've become on this point... even more far removed since becoming a Buddhist. I would really rather wear a simple wool robe!) One thing worth nothing is that the clothing was average size instead of chubby size. I hope that part comes true :P

In the last part of my dream, my friend Adam showed me a greeting card that he said he'd found at a friend's house. I read the poem in it, and simultaneously I heard Whitney Houston singing it, and I burst into tears at the end.

I wrote the poem/song down as best as I could remember and titled it "The Lark." I think it is quite nice and might try to get it published. It's a letter to God with a similar theme to "Tears of a Clown" (which, it should probably be noted, was my private theme song in kindergarten).

INTERPRETATION (via DreamMoods.com):

To see larks flying in your dream, symbolize high aspirations. To hear larks singing in your dream, signify success, pleasure and joy. You need to consider a change of environment in order to find happiness. [Interesting.]

To hear someone sing in your dream, signifies emotional and spiritual fulfillment. Your mood is changing for the positive as your outlook in life is looking up.

To hear or write songs in your dream, indicate that you are looking at things from a spiritual viewpoint. Your future will be filled with happiness and wealth. Consider the words to the song that you are dreaming about for additional messages. [It was a message about mental wellness, which I believe is my mission in life, and also a message for me to remember to laugh and be joyful.]

To dream about sex, refers to the integration and merging of contrasting aspects of yourself. It represents psychological completion.

If you dream that you are kissing a stranger, then it represents acknowledgment and acceptance of the repressed aspect of yourself. [As I suspected... I believe this dream is about a slight shift in career plans which I have been contemplating. It's a path I've resisted quite heavily... and a field in which a large part of the work repulses me... but might be the correct one and the place where I can do the most good.]

To dream of your clothes, is symbolic of your public self and how you are perceived. It is indicative of the act you put on in front of others. Clothes are also an indication of your condition and status in life. To dream that you are shopping for or buying clothes, represents your anxieties about trying to fit in or being "well-suited" for your changing role. [The aforementioned path would require specific clothing.]

To see a greeting card in your dream, suggests that surprises are in store ahead.

I dreamed I was driving my beloved late Italian Grandfather to an appointment with a hairdresser to get his hair cut. In the dream it was not surprised to see my Grandpa and I acted like this was normal. However, this was clearly in the future because I was driving him in some kind of weird huge truck with two rows of seats that I wasn't exactly comfortable driving. The roads were chaotic with other cars driving erratically and at one point it was snowing so bad that I couldn't see very clearly. I thought I saw a man lying at the side of the road on his back in a sort of fetal position. I wanted to stop and see if he was hurt but Grandpa didn't want to stop because he would be late for his appointment [This is of course not what my Grandpa would have done... he was a chief of police.]. So we get to the place, it's in an urban city center that I don't recognize. I park the truck thing and take him inside. There are two older Asian ladies sleeping on the chairs and one of them wakes up to take care of Grandpa's haircut. I tell Grandpa I'll be back in a little while and go back outside. I want to go back to where the guy on the road was to see if he was really there and needed help or if I was imagining it. But I couldn't find the truck thing.

There were lots of little shops and alleys and little parking lots and neo-punk kids everywhere, and I just kept wandering around, looking for the damned truck thing. I feel like this part of the dream lasted for hours. At one point I was almost run over by an even weirder car thing that seemed to be sorta like a race car with its wheels flat to the ground. I saw several of these at different points in the dream and was terrified of being run over by one. They moved extremely quickly and erratically, and such a vehicle would really have no business being on the road in a civilized society. I got very lost and at one point wondered if I would even find the place where I had dropped Grandpa off.

I finally find the truck thing, and by that time it is late, and I feel guilty that I never made it to check the guy on the road and that my Grandpa has been waiting for hours. I go back in to collect him and it appears he has just been happily chatting with people. We go back to the truck thing, which is easily found this time, and I have trouble unlocking it. Finally it unlocks and we get in. For some reason there are a lot of passengers in it then. And I try to start the thing, and can't, and it's dark and I can't see the controls, which I didn't feel I completely understood to begin with. Suddenly we are sliding down an incline backwards at a very high speed. People are telling me to put on the emergency brake but I can't find it. The hill seems to go on forever. We've somehow gotten to a non-urban area, as I see a bunch of evergreen trees flying past. I think my Grandpa pulled the emergency brake, because I never did find it. Someone (Grandpa?) comments that you should become familiar with the controls of something before you try to drive it.

REAL LIFE:
I woke up with a horrible headache, which is unusual.

INTERPRETATION (via DreamMoods.com):
To see your grandparents in your dream, symbolize love, security, wisdom and protection.

A dream haircut symbolizes a fresh start. You are shedding off some unwanted aspect of yourself.

To dream that you are at the hairdresser, implies that you are looking to change your attitude. You are ready for change and move in a different direction.

To see an Asian person in your dream, represents an aspect of your own self that is unknown to you. Additionally, to see an elderly Asian person, represents tradition, wisdom and knowledge.

To see a pick-up truck in your dream, represents hard work. You need to return to the basics. Alternatively, the dream may be a metaphor for something that you need to "pick up".

To dream about a blizzard, suggests that you are feeling emotionally cold and frigid. You feel excluded and left out. It may indicate a lack of love and the absence of warmth within your own family circle.

To dream that you are in parking lot, suggests that you need to slow down and take time from your daily activities.

To dream that you lose something, indicates that you may really have misplaced something that you had not realized yet. It may also be a signal for you to clean out and reorganize your life. Perhaps you are overwhelmed and distracted with the hustle and bustle of day-to-day life.Alternatively, losing something often coincides with a significant life change or waking issue.

To dream that you are searching for something, signifies the need to find something that is missing or needed in your life. The dream may be analogous to your search for love, spiritual enlightenment, peace or even a solution to a problem.

On a symbolic note, losing things in your dream suggests lost opportunities, past relationships or forgotten aspects of yourself. Your personal associations to the thing you lose will clue you into the emotional meaning and interpretation of your dream.

To see a race car in your dream, symbolizes your hard driving and headstrong attitudes. It may also reflect your competitive nature and the need to win.

To dream that you nearly escape from the impact of an automobile, denotes that you will successfully overcome any rivalry.

[From dream-dictionary.org] To dream of a lifeless corpse can represent a weakening state or a kind of death in your life that comes from devoting yourself to a miserable and lifeless routine.

To dream that you are walking or moving backwards, indicates that your current course of action may be counter-productive. Whatever you are looking for in life seems to be moving away from you. Thus, you may feel a sense of failure or belief that you are unable to achieve your goals and aspirations. On the other hand, moving backwards in your dream, indicate that you need to back off or retreat from a situation that you are currently facing in your waking life.

To dream that you are locked out, suggests that you are feeling alienated or unaccepted. You have difficulties getting in touch with your feelings. Consider what and where you are being locked out of.

OVERALL:
There seems to be some kind of message about being too random, as things in the dream seemed to be moving erratically and unpredictably. This is a recurring theme in my life. I have decided upon psychology and stuck with it (though I do still change my mind about specific career goals) but other aspects of my life, not so much. Where to live (changes weekly)... who to date or whether I even want to date or marry (changes hourly)... The truck thing seems to represent hard work, self-control and freedom. My Grandfather also symbolizes hard work, self-control and commitment (come to think of it, in the dream he frowned at me at the idea of not keeping the commitment of his appointment, hmm). My fear of commitment has something to do with a belief that it will limit my freedom. I re-watched High Fidelity last night, and the main character describes his former lack of committing to anything as "suicide. By tiny, tiny increments." Which I think is totally true. And I am one of those specific types of guys who has had trouble growing up, becoming mature. I think in the dream Grandpa meant I need to work on that before I try to have another relationship.

I dreamed there was a janitor hiding a dead body underneath a plywood platform, where children played. In the dream I wasn't so much concerned that he was hiding a dead body, which is pretty disturbing, but that it wasn't right to hide it where children might find it. I have forgotten most of the rest of the dream, but remember looking at a trash can.

INTERPRETATION (Via DreamMoods.com):

To see or dream that you are a janitor, suggests that you need to work on cleaning up an aspect of your life.

To see a burial in your dream, indicates that you have gotten rid of your bad habits and have freed yourself from a negative situation. You are finally letting go of something. If you are burying a body, then it suggests that you are trying to hide something that you find repulsive or that others may find unappealing.

To dream that someone is hiding, indicates that you are looking for a sense of security and protection.

To see children in your dream, signify an aspect of yourself and your childlike qualities. You may be retreating back to a childlike state and longing for the past. You are trying to still satisfy repressed desires and unfulfilled hopes. Perhaps there is something that you need to see grow and nurture.

To see a garbage can in your dream, symbolizes unwanted ideas, thoughts or memories. It is time to rid yourself of the baggage.

[Wow, it's pretty clear what this dream means. I've been changing and letting a lot of things go, dare I say healing.]

I dreamed I had a cat who was having seizures. Nobody could figure out what was wrong with it. Then the cat spoke and said, in a cat voice like you can find on various talking cat You Tube videos, "Diabetes."

REAL LIFE:
The day before yesterday I bought a Gatorade for the first time in forever. The next morning I woke up feeling so much better and clearly having lost 3 or 4 pounds of water weight. This aggravated me a little because I forgot how much Gatorade helped me, which I discovered way back when I lived in Columbus. When I was dating that one girl I let her convince me that I shouldn't drink it because of the sugar content and artificial coloring. While that is a valid concern, the benefit seems to outweigh it in this instance. As far as Diabetes, it does run in my family, and so I've been checked for it repeatedly with absolutely no sign of it. I think this dream was probably just my unconscious concerns about the sugar in the Gatorade I drank. I'm not sure why my body seems to need potassium so badly but I really need to consistently supplement with it. I don't know if it is known to help myasthenia gravis which is what I believe I've been suffering from all these years. Funny that the cat had a mystery illness :P

INTERPRETATION (via DreamMoods.com):
To dream that animals can talk, represent superior knowledge. Its message is often some form of wisdom. (Oh crap.)

To see a cat in your dream, symbolizes an independent spirit, feminine sexuality, creativity, and power. It also represents misfortune and bad luck. (Oh crap.)

To read or watch a mystery in your dream, indicates that you need to be on the lookout for something that is out of place or out of the ordinary. Something is not what it appears to be. Be careful in your dealings. (Oh crap.)

To dream that you have a seizure, indicates a lack of control in your life. (I'm reclaiming it :P)

I dreamed I was planting a garden. That's pretty much it.

INTERPRETATION (via DreamMoods.com):

To dream that you are planting something, represents your faith and optimism about the future.

I dreamed I was grocery shopping with my mother. The significant thing was that she kept complimenting me, which would be highly unusual behavior for her. Then I was talking with a couple in the freezer aisle. The husband didn't look at me straight on, as he was bent over the center freezer section examining frozen food. I noticed it was odd that he wore the same white hat that his wife wore-- kind of a wide-brimmed ladies' sun hat or Sunday dress hat. Then an old lady across the aisle yelled hello to them, then she added something to the effect of "By the way, you're a boy." And I looked at the couple face on and saw the guy was wearing makeup and the same dress as his wife. He was frowning now, and said to his wife, "Do you like it?" and she said "Of course I do," and gave him a kiss.

REAL LIFE:
This dream made me think about how my mother was always so critical of me and never had anything nice to say to me ever. I think she is actually incapable of complimenting me, thus the silence when I graduated. If it weren't for my paternal Grandma, my maternal Grandpa, and all of the wonderful teachers I had, I wouldn't have received any positive feedback at all growing up. I am very thankful that I had those people in my life.

INTERPRETATION (via DreamMoods.com):
To shop for groceries in your dream, represents some emotional of physical need that you are currently lacking in your life. You may be in need of nurturance and some fulfillment.

To see your mother in your dream, represents the nurturing aspect of your own character. Mothers offer shelter, comfort, life, guidance and protection. [Not in my case.] Some people may have problems freeing themselves from their mothers and are thus seeking their own individuality and development.

To dream that you are being complimented, refers to your desire for romance and love.

To see a couple in your dream, symbolize marriage, your parents, or a relationship. Consider what the couple are doing in your dream for additional clues about their significance. It may point to something that is lacking or missing from your life.

To dream that you or someone is cross-dressing, indicates that you need to express and acknowledge your masculine side if you are female or your feminine side if you are male.

[Overall I think this dream is about letting go of anger and cultivating mildness as a Buddhist text has recently reminded me. Instead of being angry I should wish my parents and sister will find healing for their disturbed mind states. I also of course do wish I had a typical mother and crave acceptance and love, like anyone else. But it is best to focus on being accepting and loving myself.]

I didn't get to sleep until kind of late but I slept sooooo sooooo much better than I have in the last month and I feel so rested. (Thank you raw thyroid pills from New Zealand???)

Also I had strange dreams in that I was aware of what situations the dreams were referring to!!! I've never had that happen before.

I had a long involved dream about being at some camp and having people stealing things out of my locker. Several people helped me find an appropriate lock for the locker. In the dream I knew this was a dream about being transgender.

Somewhere in there I saw a horrible pile of dead animals of different types. I can remember seeing a donkey in there but the rest of the animals weren't clear. I was cleaning up this awful pile but I didn't feel horrified and there wasn't any blood. In the dream I knew this was a dream about my relationship with my parents.

INTERPRETATION (via DreamMoods.com):

To dream that you are camping, refers to your social circle and support group. You are looking for a sense of belonging, but at the same time be self-sufficient and independent. [Spot on!]

To see or use a locker in your dream, signifies aspects of yourself which you have kept hidden inside. [Haha.... my dream self was right, this is SO a trans dream. I want to be more out about being FTM.]

To dream that you are stealing, suggests that you are feeling deprived. The locale of where the stealing takes place is indicative of your neediness. [I need to get back in touch with the trans community. I'm not one of those people cut out to move to the suburbs and pretend to be normal.]

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To dream that you are cleaning, implies that you are removing some negativity in your life and overcoming major obstacles. [True.]

To see the dead in your dream, forewarns that you are being influenced by negative people and are hanging around the wrong crowd. [True again... I need to move!!]

To see an ass in your dream, signifies a lack of understanding. [So true!] It also suggests that you will come upon many annoyances. [Ugh, no more, please!] The dream may be a metaphor for someone who is being an ass. [LOL]

Additionally, the fact that I was cleaning up dispassionately is significant and reflects the reality. I also think the fact that there was "no blood" is significant on several levels. As in, no blood = no bond, and no blood = without bloodshed.

Had the usual trouble sleeping again. Got to sleep around 5am and woke up at 10am. I dreamed a lot of stuff I can't recall. The only thing I can remember is seeing a wedding and thinking how the couple had gotten married impulsively without being aware of important issues.

INTERPRETATION (via DreamMoods.com):

To dream of a marriage, signifies commitment, harmony or transitions. You are undergoing an important developmental phase in your life. [I can see that.] To see a wedding in your dream, symbolizes a new beginning or transition in your current life. They reflect your issues about commitment and independence. [Yeah!] Alternatively, your wedding dream refers to feelings of bitterness, sorrow, or death. Such dreams are often negative and highlight some anxiety or fear. If you dream that the wedding goes wrong or ends in disaster, then it suggests that there is more negativity that needs to be dealt with. [OK probably that is more like it.]

I dreamed I was writing in my journal (how prophetic!!!) and I was relating some long incident that happened (which I can't remember) and I wrote that I had no dreams to report (LOL irony).

INTERPRETATION (Via DreamMoods.com):

To dream that you are writing, signifies some sort of communication with someone or with your conscious mind. The dream may also be a metaphor that you are "right" [Hah... Aren't I always? :P]

[Other than that, I've got nothing.]

My dreams decided to give me a little comic relief I guess. I dreamed I was Monk investigating a murder in a huge prison. I don't remember much except walking through the halls with Captain Stottlemeyer and my assistant (who was a blonde girl but not either of Monk's assistants from the show). We arrived finally at the far end, where there was a huge line of prisoners winding down the staircase. I was told they were forced to wait there because the chapel didn't have enough seats for everybody to sit during the religious ceremony (which was compulsory). I didn't think that was right but we got in line and just waited there. The sound of gospel music was in the background. I felt the captain was standing too close behind me in the line. That's all I can remember.

INTERPRETATION (with the help of DreamMoods.com):

To dream that you are a detective, indicates that you are searching for your hidden abilities and talents. You may be trying to solve a problem and seek out the truth about some worrisome issue.

To see a prison or convict in your dream, indicates that an aspect of yourself is unable to freely express itself.

To see the outside of the church in your dream, signifies sacredness and spiritual nourishment. It is representative of your value system and the things you hold sacred.

To hear harmonious and soothing music in your dream, signifies prosperity and pleasure. You are expressing your emotions in a positive way. Music serves to heal the soul.

To see a line of people or objects, indicates that you need to be more aware of some situation or relationship.

To dream that you are standing in line, represents your need for patience. You need to learn to wait for something and not always have it right away.

To dream that you are in or part of a crowd, suggests that you need some space for yourself. You need solitude to reflect on a situation and recharge your energy. Consider also the familiar phrase of "going along with the crowd" which implies conformity and lack of individuality. Perhaps you feel that your own opinion doesn't count or matter.

[It took a few hours to process but I think I get the basic meaning behind this dream. Not everyone is allowed into my sacred space, nor should they be. People can queue up, but there is only a small percentage of them who are ever getting in. Boundaries!!!]